If you think your child is being bullied or if your child has told you that he or she is being bullied, you can help. Parents are often the best resource to build a child’s self confidence and to teach him or her how to best solve problems. Here are a few ways you can help:
* Talk to your child’s teacher about it instead of confronting the bully’s parents. If the teacher doesn’t act to stop the bullying, talk to the principal.
* Teach your child nonviolent ways to deal with bullies, like walking away, playing with friends, or talking it out.
* Help your child act with self confidence. With him or her, practice walking upright, looking people in the eye, and speaking clearly.
* Don’t encourage your child to fight. This could lead to him or her getting hurt, getting in trouble, and beginning more serious problems with the bully.
* Involve your child in activities outside of school. This way he or she can make friends in a different social circle.
I feel like most children have been bullied at some point in their life. I’m not saying it is right or acceptable, but that it does happen to most of us. I remember being in elementary school and being bullied myself. I wore very thick glasses and sometimes had to wear a patch over my lazy eye. I hated it! I felt odd and knew that I didn’t look like everyone else. I was often called “four eyes”. It definitely hurt my feelings. I never told my parents – I just lived with it. Often I would just go along with it or make fun of my glasses myself. I felt like it would take the sting out of it if I laughed at it too. Thank goodness for contacts!
One of my kids has been on the other side of this issue where he has been the bully. I had a very upset mother get a hold of me with the complaint. As a parent, I hit the nail right on the head. I sat down with my child and explained how his actions hurt another. We made a card of apology to the other child. I went and met with his teacher and principal and told them that I wouldn’t tolerate this behavior and to get a hold of me if it continued. Once my child realized that I wouldn’t condone this or cover for him – he shaped up and I think learned a great lesson.
-Jenny
